Thursday June 4th - 4:38a PST

So here I am creating a new blog bc I am torn between what I should do next? I am an entrepreneur at heart and I have had my shot at starting a business. I am torn bc it is hard role to lead. The expectations you set of people or business partners can be set too high that I find myself constantly disappointed. I have been told that perhaps I expect too much or maybe I am being to PC about certain situations. I try my best to do a good job at what I do. I read and research and talk to plenty of people young, old, smart and inexperienced. You just never know what lessons or who you will meet out there. Today was a tough day because it made me question myself and my own abilities to see if I had what it took to startup a business. It is very hard to startup anything from scratch, but every bit of my foundation embraces this challenge.

I feel that our schools... our colleges don't really teach individuality. Perhaps MBA programs help to bring this side out - but still we are mostly taught to follow the COG. Be a team player. Work your way up the ladder. My folks moved to the States and overcame many obstacles to get here and succeed. What is my story to my kids? That I worked a 9-5 job in IT for 40+ years? Yes, that is a possibility, but I know I have the ability to do greater than that. I want to inspire my children. I want to inspire myself. I want to make an impact and not just be a team player. It is this desire or drive that also provides much stress for me since I expect too many things. Not everyone has this thinking and I don't know if it could ever be taught. You either have it or you don't... or perhaps everyone has it and it takes a life changing event to realize it's there. I know my capabilities and I know what I can do... but hey sometimes you gotta get knocked down to get back up right? I'm getting knocked down a lot of times these days, but I keep getting up.

Thanks for reading my post... if anyone is reading this. I am going to utilize this blog to chronicle my steps to try to create something interesting with my life and create a purpose to inspire my kids and my peers.

G'night!

EnjoiOC....